Monday, July 16, 2007

Miniature Pinscher-Defined

The AKC states this dogs has the following description:

General Appearance The Miniature Pinscher is structurally a well balanced, sturdy, compact, short-coupled, smooth-coated dog. He naturally is well groomed, proud, vigorous and alert. Characteristic traits are his hackney-like action, fearless animation, complete self-possession, and his spirited presence.

Having lived with one for a bit now, his is my new definition of Min-Pin's characteristics:
  • Small dog of black and tan coloring that believes he is 100lbs and bullet proof
  • "vigorous" should translate into "snorts one-to-two lines of cocaine every morning"
  • No matter how hard you try, you cannot locate the stash of cocaine
  • Believes 0520 is the best time to sing at the top of his lungs
  • Advice for above, sleep with the bedroom door shut
  • Loves chew toys that are twice his size
  • A show of affection is grooming you for fleas: doing that front teeth only bite-bite-bite thing on you and/or your $300 Pottery Barn duvet!
  • Advice for above: Do Not allow on bed
  • Walk on leash at your own risk, cat-like reflexes are necessary so as not to become ensnarded in leash by dog
  • Advice for above, walk anyway, it wears off the cocaine
  • Best advice, when you can't hear the dog, GO LOOK, because he is digging out of the yard!
  • He loves mud
  • Did I mention he loves mud, espcially the slimy kind??

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