Sold...Almost!

I have my motorcycle on Craig's list hoping to find it a new home. As much as I love it, I want something I can actually touch the ground while straddling. Someone contacted me and we met up for him to have a look. Loved it, and called back later and said he wanted it. So I thought, cool! But, alas, he backed out considering he has been in the US only 4 months and has already bought a house and a car. Understandable!!
I will continue to try and sell it and I know it will happen in good time. I am determined to re-home Moose! Other bikes await me!
This time around I will begin the search by riding as many bikes as I can get near. The dilemma is thus:
I like performance
I want to touch the ground
Shorter performance bikes are really expensive
I don't think cruisers are going to do it for me


Heavy sigh,
I am sure the right thing will come along.

Girl Moments

I have found as the end of school nears, I am prone to "Girl Moments." I think it is the stress and long-term tired I have going on right now. Girl Moments are really foreign to me as I am not the cry or emotionally out of sorts type of female. Mind over matter!
But a week ago, there I was, not being able to sleep and very upset.

I think as you near the end of something you have worked really hard at; school, a new job, marriage, kids leaving for college; your psyche senses the change. Change brings new horizons and the unknown. I think the "new" flushes out some insecurity or trepidation of finishing the "known" and the "Holy crap!!" of starting something new.
Hence, the Girl-ness.
I am better now and don't feel quite so upset. It is just time to live in one place, have one thing to do for a living and find a routine again.
As the light grows brighter at the end of the tunnel, closer is the end of one journey. The light is another journey about to begin.
Holy Crap!

Accomplishment

This weekend, I helped move my mom and sister into a new rental property. My mother's condition had deteriorated to the point that living alone was no longer a good idea.

We got my sister moved from her place (and out of the situation) in a couple hours. My mom took a little longer as there were a few more items of furniture and LOTS more clothes!

I cannot really verbalize how proud of my sister I am. She has made a decision to leave the worthless individual she was involved with and pursue a better life.

She has also chosen to step up to the responsibility of helping care for my mom. No simple task.

Her accomplishment of will is extraordinary. She chose to have a better life and step into the unknown because it had to be better than where she was.
I am so proud of her.
She did it.

All of my siblings and I are are universally supportive. She will be successful, I have faith.
It will take a while to settle into a new routine, for her and for mom. But it will be beneficial for both.

Way to go Sis!!

Spring Break is almost over...

Today is good Friday and the end of Spring Break is looming! I have one more assignment to finish and ALL of my assignments will be done and turned in for the rest of the semester!!!

This is very exciting!
I have been busy, busy this week with all that, getting my mom and sister ready to move tomorrow and working. The week has flown by! As the end of school is in sight, I have a sense of impatience that got to me a little this week. I am very ready for the nomadic life to end. It is strange what you miss; routine, your stuff, cooking, cleaning house.....I'll never gripe about cleaning again. I miss keeping a house and everything that goes along with it.

Although really busy, it was a tough week too. Of course the end in this case justifies the means, but the means is getting really, um, stale. I just keep telling myself it will be over soon.
And it will.

It's good for more than you think!!

This is a fun article in Women's Health, which is one of my favorite magazines. It's about weight loss tips and how the more sex the better. I can't think of a better way to lose weight! I also read in Playboy last month that it is estimated that over 40% of marriages are sexless marriages. No wonder lots of people are overweight, depressed and angry. It's all just a vicious circle!!

Laughter, friends, lots of sex and organizing your life so that it is happy is the way to go! The first three are the major part of the last one! Go home and get it on with your significant other, call your friends to keep up and go work out! WooHoo!

Dolphins Saves Whale and Baby Whale

CNN has a story of a dolphin in New Zealand assisting a stranded whale and her baby to safety!!

Very cool!

Spring Break!

As of today, I am officially on Spring Break! I have all next week off and my hope is to get the rest of the semester's assignments done and turned in. I also hope to sleep A LOT. The irregular schedule I have to keep between work and school is wearing me down, especially since the Camp Summit Plague still pains me. I just can't get rid of the cough, or the nasal congestion.

Anyway, the ToDo list for now until next Sunday is thus:

• Taxes
• Lecture questions
• Modules finished (3 is almost done, then 4)
• SL project turned in (this is the assignment associated with Camp Summit)
• Work
  

That is my list, very do-able in fact. After spring break, it is three more days of clinicals, 60 hrs of transition to nursing and then two tests. Then it will be OVER!!

I can then study for the NCLEX and (please, oh please) pass it on the first try. Wow, after that, the internship starts and I get to do only one thing professionally again.

Camp Summit Lives On...

Every single one of us who went to camp Summit have come down with some awful bug. I am so tired of being ill. I am on the mend, but all of us who visited germ mecca contracted some awful thing. Presently, most of us are on the mend, myself included. I do still get tired really easily, but it is improving.

Just goes to show how important daily, regular hygiene is. That was herd immunity I don't have!!

More rest, more fluids...(does that include vodka??)

A Weekend at Camp Summit

This past weekend I was completing my service learning project for nursing school. This is basically 20hrs or more of community service. I and several of my fellow nursing school students chose Camp Summit to do our community service at. This is a camp for developmentally delayed or mentally retarded people. This weekend was adult weekend so the age range-chronologically that is- was 18 to 65 years old.

First of all, this is a very “outside the box” excursion for me. Admittedly, I am not so comfortable with the mentally retarded or otherwise “off” people. There are people who are much better at than I am. My ex-husband being one of them.

At any rate, the weekend was a good experience, even if it is one that I am ever so glad is finally over.

I came away from this weekend with a new and permanent appreciation of the fact that all my neurons are properly connected. I am equally thrilled that all my friends’ kids have their neurons properly connected.

This is a gift that we take for granted most of the time. Again, our health is something we take for granted because it has been here so long and we have never been without it.

Let me tell you, there are people who have never had a normal day in their lives.
Nor have their parents.

You could see the tired and lifetime of tired in some of the parents’ eyes that came to drop off kids. Then there was the group homes – homes where those who have no one and live in a group environment. This made me sad in lots of ways.

This weekend raised many questions for me personally; what is the reason for some of these people living among us? It is so difficult for them to be here, why are they still here? How will these people finally die? This question was especially prominent for those who are violent when you try to care for them. Right now, they are young and relatively healthy. Later, when old age kicks in, languishing in a bed or wheel chair can be truly awful.

Many difficult ethical questions coursed through my mind, and still do. The biologist in me says some of these people should never have made it out of the hospital. Just because we can save lives doesn’t always mean we should. The human in me says they have something to teach and we have something to learn. The logical person in me asks why are we doing this? To what end will this serve?

I don’t have answers to all these questions, or maybe not a lot of answers I am willing to post without explanation, but I think the answers to these questions will continue to evolve.

After all, the mind and the parachute are alike in their function; both work best open.

It's Official

It is official, I accepted an internship with Presbyterian Dallas in the Neuro ICU. It starts in June, and is 16wks long, and the major bonus is it is a day shift! I am sure I will learn a great deal and all will go well. That is one major thing off my list!

That was one goal I had wanted to accomplish; have a job lined up by March. It is a load off knowing where I will go. So far, one other nursing student friend is going there as well. Two more are scheduled to interview. We will see.

I can't wait for this to be over, to have an adult life again. It is really starting to drag. Just a few more weeks!!

And so it begins....

I am not even half way through the semester and already the job interviews are looming. I have had one for a large hospital in the area (thank god it is NOT down town) for the neuro ICU. They did offer the position, but I have a second interview for the ER at the same hospital tomorrow.

I will have a job by Friday. It is a great feeling knowing that in February, 3 months before I graduate, I don't have to worry about having a job. If the ER (ED in more "current" terms - Emergency Department) offers, I then have to take a long hard look at me and decide which is better for my personality. I don't think either would be wrong, but I want to really give that some thought.

Of course the panic has set in as well. Holy S@@!!@@T, people will expect ME to answer their questions and possibly prevent them or their family from dying.....

Christy said the 4th semester panic is normal and that it will pass. Once in the internship, I will be too busy and overwhelmed to worry...

wish me luck!

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Give your sweetie a hug, kiss and something extra!
Get naked!!
If you are sweetie-less, be happy with you!
Otherwise, sweetie may not be the adjective with which you describe the person you are with!
:-O

Have a happy day!
It is your actions, not what you buy, that makes the gift.
Love
Praise
Support

If I can make it through February...

My group finished our nursing project and presented it today! So much prep and it is finally done! I really must say, I think our group did the best of the 4 that presented today. We were organized, polished and everyone laughed and interacted so well in the discussion. Yeah!

Today reminded me that public speaking is something most people just don't do. It is very hard to get up in front of people and not read the power point. I have done so much presenting in science that I had forgotten how upsetting it is to most people to perform a presentation. Our talk was on delegation to the licensed personnel. A topic that is vague in its coverage in the board of nursing's guide lines.

All we have left to do is post to our online groups for final points. Oh, and that has to be done tonight along with the HW due tomorrow, and I have to take care of my mother's medications and fill out her application for a new residence, oh and at least say "hi" to my man. Whew....

By the end of February, the majority of crap, er, school "hoops" will have been jumped through.
Can't wait!!

I am What Size?

I have interviews starting up this week. Having worked in a lab for 12 years, I obviously don't have anything that would be appropriate for an interview. No, most of my clothes have stains on them, bleach marks and are so frayed, they tickle my feet.

Consequently, I don't know how to shop, nor do I enjoy it at all.

In steps KP, the personal shopper who has also shopped with Jen. It is frightening how much help I needed.

Shopping with KP is quite the eduction and I am in her debt for a really long time. I see lots of sushi dinners in her future!

At any rate, success was had, we found a suite that is great, fantastic shoes ( I love shoes), and I learned that my sizing is "petite." Never would have guessed that considering the size of my, um, posterior, but nursing school will be over soon and the excess posterior will go away. Petite refers to my short appendages.

What is it that really helps people?

This semester includes taking care of cancer patients. Having had a father that died of cancer, I have seen what goes on during treatment, physical decline and finally death.

My thought was, other than all the drugs, what really helps?

One of my charges this week included a wonderful woman with lymphoma. Newly diagnosed and very unsure of what to expect, we had the opportunity for lots of talk time and education. On the second morning of her care, she looked a bit frazzeled to me so I asked what was up. She explained how she just melted down yesterday and all the other feelings she has about what the treatments were doing to her life. Recognizing a fellow control-freak, I told her it was good she could get it all out and that melting down was expected and healthy. You can face it when it finally gets out.

She had no idea you should look at it that way; to her, it was losing control.

She said that helped so much. Just to be told what she is going through is to be expected, her reactions, acceptable.

Cancer can step into any life. If that life is outgoing, independant, healthy and happy with lots of activities, cancer interrups all of that. The frustration I have seen is worse sometimes than the drugs.

Just being able to talk to someone who says, "Hey, you are gonna melt down, it's OK," I think that helps too.

With how busy nurses are, we cannot lose sight that are first priority is nurturing. I hope I can keep that in mind through my career. If I lose sight of that, I think I'll do something else.

Breckenridge, the final say

Breckenridge was great fun! We did spend one day in Vail, as our lift tickets worked there as well.

Unless you are, oh, an Olympic level skier, don't bother. Green runs end in blacks or even moguls, the mountain isn't marked (we had to go uphill at one point), and not much is groomed. The lift lines were crazy long, but it was Saturday. It is stunningly beautiful. The whole place is right off a postcard with snow laden trees that are so perfect you can't believe they are real.

A new development, if we go back to Breck next year, I will try snowboarding again. I know, I know, glutton for pain and punishment, but at Breck, it is so much more conducive to learning. Nice, wide, gently sloping greens, no cliffs to fall off of like Winter Park. I have to try again, it looks like too much fun--still. I spent one morning with one of the bunch that was trying snowboarding for the first time. Just to see how much room there is to learn with, I gotta try again if we go back. I have heard beaver creek is the same way.

Snowboarding again...I have to!

Week Two of Semester 4

Ok, I am busy enough. Finally! With three classes, 20hr/wk work, family obligations and martial arts and the gym, I have attained busy again. Really busy.

I like this best! At the hospital were are doing the nursing stuff now. We are taking care of 2, 3, 4, sometimes 5 patients. We are responsible for charting and doing everything right. I have had the apparently common panic attack of, "holy crap, I may have to keep someone from dying." We have been told that said panic attack is normal fourth semester. It passed already-the panic attack that is. Haven't lost anyone yet....

Our additional class this semester is nursing management. It is all online, my favorite method, and involves lots of writing. I feel deeply for the few in our class who do not type. Sad day for them! Lots of lots of stuff online to type!

We do get to rotate through ICU and ER which I am looking forward to. These are on the possible list and I need to know what it's like.

That is the school update! Wish me luck keeping my head above water!

Thoughts From Friends

One of my nursing school buddies sent this out. I thought instead of forwarding it I would jsut posit it. I especially like 13, 14, 19 and 25.

40 Tips for an Exceptional, Healthy & Powerful Life in 2008!

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Record your late night shows and get more sleep.
4. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, "My purpose is to ____ today."
5. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
6. Watch more movies, play more games and read more books than you did in 2007.
7. Make time to practice meditation , prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend more time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10.Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan Salmon, broccoli, almonds & walnuts .
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Clear your clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and flowing energy into your life .
14. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
15. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
16. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid.
17. Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away.
18. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does .
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
23. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about .
24. Burn the candles, use the nice bed sheets, Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. What other people think of you is none of your business .
29. Time heals almost everything. Give time.
30. However good or bad a situation is, it will change. So stop complaining about the weather, the job, the bills, etc. Etc.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
32. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
33. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
34. The best is yet to come.
35. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
36. Do the right thing!
37. Call your family often.
38. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: " I am thankful for ___." Today I accomplished ____.
39. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
40. Enjoy the ride. Remember that this is not Disney World and you certainly don't want a fast pace. You only have one ride through life so make the most of it and enjoy the ride. Have a fantastic 2008!

Powder, Cold and Mountains

The annual skip trip is here! Basically, we are the same group with a few deletions or changes in those attending. We number 17 this year! Breckenridge is the locale and there has been tons of snow!
For those of you who read regularly, I admitted defeat this year and am happily skiing with friends! The snowboard wins and I sucked at it. I am skiing the blues and having a great time. The best part about our group is everyone skis with whomever is at their level. With a group of 17, there is always someone to ski with!

The high this week was 27 and we have already seen that. The high today was 19 with a wind chill of 4. BBBbbbrrrrr!!

I have sore thighs and my calves are having a small conversation with me, but other than that, I am great! The last run today felt really good with my legs not getting so tired. I must be doing something better!

John has already taken an entire 4gig card on his camera, so plenty of pics are a promise. Keep you posted on how the rest of the week goes!

We Only Learn Through Failure

This is an excellent article about Failure by Oprah listed on CNN.

Our society always uses the word "perfect" when nothing is nor ever will be. We are supposed to, as a species continue to learn. How do we really learn?

By not succeeding....failing.

I know personally the lessons most valuable to me are the ones I learned through truly terrific error or failure.

I like how the article also addresses success:

"Success is as dangerous as failure," said Lao-tzu, and any life coach knows this is true. I can't count the number of times people have told me, "I hate the job I'm doing, but I'm good at it. To do what I want, I'd have to start at zero and I might fail."
Dwelling on failure can make us miserable, but dwelling on success can turn us into galley slaves, bound to our wretched benches solely by the thought, I hate this, but at least I'm good at it.

I also agree with the following that discusses a better attitude toward failing:

This is the magic of accepting that you've done your very best but failed. Own your failure openly, publicly, with genuine regret but absolutely no shame, and you'll reap a harvest of forgiveness, trust, respect, and connection -- the things you thought you'd get by succeeding. Ironic, isn't it?

What is it in our society that makes most fear failure so intensely? How else do we expect to learn? I personally believe the most valuable things to learn are the most costly to us. Why would you want to go through pain, hurt, emotional turmoil or financial expense and learn nothing?
Not learning would be even more expensive.
Wow, because then you have to fail the same way again.
No thanks.