What is it that really helps people?

This semester includes taking care of cancer patients. Having had a father that died of cancer, I have seen what goes on during treatment, physical decline and finally death.

My thought was, other than all the drugs, what really helps?

One of my charges this week included a wonderful woman with lymphoma. Newly diagnosed and very unsure of what to expect, we had the opportunity for lots of talk time and education. On the second morning of her care, she looked a bit frazzeled to me so I asked what was up. She explained how she just melted down yesterday and all the other feelings she has about what the treatments were doing to her life. Recognizing a fellow control-freak, I told her it was good she could get it all out and that melting down was expected and healthy. You can face it when it finally gets out.

She had no idea you should look at it that way; to her, it was losing control.

She said that helped so much. Just to be told what she is going through is to be expected, her reactions, acceptable.

Cancer can step into any life. If that life is outgoing, independant, healthy and happy with lots of activities, cancer interrups all of that. The frustration I have seen is worse sometimes than the drugs.

Just being able to talk to someone who says, "Hey, you are gonna melt down, it's OK," I think that helps too.

With how busy nurses are, we cannot lose sight that are first priority is nurturing. I hope I can keep that in mind through my career. If I lose sight of that, I think I'll do something else.

Breckenridge, the final say

Breckenridge was great fun! We did spend one day in Vail, as our lift tickets worked there as well.

Unless you are, oh, an Olympic level skier, don't bother. Green runs end in blacks or even moguls, the mountain isn't marked (we had to go uphill at one point), and not much is groomed. The lift lines were crazy long, but it was Saturday. It is stunningly beautiful. The whole place is right off a postcard with snow laden trees that are so perfect you can't believe they are real.

A new development, if we go back to Breck next year, I will try snowboarding again. I know, I know, glutton for pain and punishment, but at Breck, it is so much more conducive to learning. Nice, wide, gently sloping greens, no cliffs to fall off of like Winter Park. I have to try again, it looks like too much fun--still. I spent one morning with one of the bunch that was trying snowboarding for the first time. Just to see how much room there is to learn with, I gotta try again if we go back. I have heard beaver creek is the same way.

Snowboarding again...I have to!

Week Two of Semester 4

Ok, I am busy enough. Finally! With three classes, 20hr/wk work, family obligations and martial arts and the gym, I have attained busy again. Really busy.

I like this best! At the hospital were are doing the nursing stuff now. We are taking care of 2, 3, 4, sometimes 5 patients. We are responsible for charting and doing everything right. I have had the apparently common panic attack of, "holy crap, I may have to keep someone from dying." We have been told that said panic attack is normal fourth semester. It passed already-the panic attack that is. Haven't lost anyone yet....

Our additional class this semester is nursing management. It is all online, my favorite method, and involves lots of writing. I feel deeply for the few in our class who do not type. Sad day for them! Lots of lots of stuff online to type!

We do get to rotate through ICU and ER which I am looking forward to. These are on the possible list and I need to know what it's like.

That is the school update! Wish me luck keeping my head above water!

Thoughts From Friends

One of my nursing school buddies sent this out. I thought instead of forwarding it I would jsut posit it. I especially like 13, 14, 19 and 25.

40 Tips for an Exceptional, Healthy & Powerful Life in 2008!

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Record your late night shows and get more sleep.
4. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, "My purpose is to ____ today."
5. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
6. Watch more movies, play more games and read more books than you did in 2007.
7. Make time to practice meditation , prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend more time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10.Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan Salmon, broccoli, almonds & walnuts .
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Clear your clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and flowing energy into your life .
14. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
15. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
16. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid.
17. Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away.
18. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does .
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
23. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about .
24. Burn the candles, use the nice bed sheets, Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. What other people think of you is none of your business .
29. Time heals almost everything. Give time.
30. However good or bad a situation is, it will change. So stop complaining about the weather, the job, the bills, etc. Etc.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
32. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
33. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
34. The best is yet to come.
35. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
36. Do the right thing!
37. Call your family often.
38. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: " I am thankful for ___." Today I accomplished ____.
39. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
40. Enjoy the ride. Remember that this is not Disney World and you certainly don't want a fast pace. You only have one ride through life so make the most of it and enjoy the ride. Have a fantastic 2008!

Powder, Cold and Mountains

The annual skip trip is here! Basically, we are the same group with a few deletions or changes in those attending. We number 17 this year! Breckenridge is the locale and there has been tons of snow!
For those of you who read regularly, I admitted defeat this year and am happily skiing with friends! The snowboard wins and I sucked at it. I am skiing the blues and having a great time. The best part about our group is everyone skis with whomever is at their level. With a group of 17, there is always someone to ski with!

The high this week was 27 and we have already seen that. The high today was 19 with a wind chill of 4. BBBbbbrrrrr!!

I have sore thighs and my calves are having a small conversation with me, but other than that, I am great! The last run today felt really good with my legs not getting so tired. I must be doing something better!

John has already taken an entire 4gig card on his camera, so plenty of pics are a promise. Keep you posted on how the rest of the week goes!

We Only Learn Through Failure

This is an excellent article about Failure by Oprah listed on CNN.

Our society always uses the word "perfect" when nothing is nor ever will be. We are supposed to, as a species continue to learn. How do we really learn?

By not succeeding....failing.

I know personally the lessons most valuable to me are the ones I learned through truly terrific error or failure.

I like how the article also addresses success:

"Success is as dangerous as failure," said Lao-tzu, and any life coach knows this is true. I can't count the number of times people have told me, "I hate the job I'm doing, but I'm good at it. To do what I want, I'd have to start at zero and I might fail."
Dwelling on failure can make us miserable, but dwelling on success can turn us into galley slaves, bound to our wretched benches solely by the thought, I hate this, but at least I'm good at it.

I also agree with the following that discusses a better attitude toward failing:

This is the magic of accepting that you've done your very best but failed. Own your failure openly, publicly, with genuine regret but absolutely no shame, and you'll reap a harvest of forgiveness, trust, respect, and connection -- the things you thought you'd get by succeeding. Ironic, isn't it?

What is it in our society that makes most fear failure so intensely? How else do we expect to learn? I personally believe the most valuable things to learn are the most costly to us. Why would you want to go through pain, hurt, emotional turmoil or financial expense and learn nothing?
Not learning would be even more expensive.
Wow, because then you have to fail the same way again.
No thanks.

Unexpected Gifts

Merry Christmas everyone! I thought I would drop a note to let you know an unexpected gift the holiday season.

I talked with my brother in New Jersey this morning. He was very excited about his new digital camera he received for a gift.
My brother in his excitement told me, "Kelly (his wife) likes to go do family stuff, and we can take pictures now and send them to everyone, it'll be great! We never did anything like that growing up. It is amazing to go and watch the kids and all, can't wait to send pictures."

I thought it was a great gift, he is having a better life with his family than we did growing up. He figured out how to
have a better life all on his own, and I'm really proud of him!

The gift of family and the gift of enjoying them.
Perfect.

Merry Christmas.

Merry, Happy and Everything in Between!

I want to wish everyone a very happy holiday! Best wishes in the new year for happiness and success.

Be safe, laugh lots, and enjoy every day. For each day is a gift.

Order Your Organism

I saw this link from the Washington Post on synthetic DNA and the organisms that are being created. This is big business for the 21st century and beyond.

As a scientist, I have both excitement and trepidation concerning artificial DNA and the organisms it alters or creates. Some of what is discussed in the article simply have added genes to bacteria to produce chemicals needed for an array of different things.

Another side is the actual engineering of a whole genome for an organism that may or may not already exist. A safe guard mentioned in maintaining/controlling genetically altered bacteria is the fact these bugs are engineered with a artificial nutrient dependence and thus would not be able to survive outside the lab.

Where have we heard that before?

Never under estimate the adaptive ability of nature, nor the drive to survive and reproduce. That is all bacteria and viruses are programmed to do.

The article also discusses virus creation. I'd hate for I am Legend (originally The Omega Man)to actually come to fruition. I really enjoyed the movie, by the way.

It is an interesting article. But one last point:
Just because we can, does not always mean we should.

Three Down, One to Go!

I finished my third semester! I have a month to relax and work, then on to the fourth semester--the last one!!

Fourth is supposed to be the hardest, with you having to do several things at once. I think maybe I will finally be busy enough...

Scheduling work will be a bit of a challenge it seems, but there is always the weekend too. I have tried to keep the weekends for sleeping and studying and other things recreational, but I may have to give in this last semester. It will all work out I am sure.

My grades were good, not a s good as I would have liked, but since there were no A's, I can't complain. A few did not make the grade to continue on, so I am counting myself fortunate. We are all having a celebratory night at the Fox and Hound in Richardson tonight. I am looking forward to hanging out with everyone.

It has been a long semester....

One more to go!!

Gratification of Sweat

I finally got back to martial arts class. I have been hit-or-miss for way too long.
Damn nursing school...

There is such gratification in working out and sweating with other people, all doing the same thing. The class activity is great. Going to the gym is not quite the same, but close.

I hope to attend regularly at least for the month I am off. Then try really hard to come once the ominous fourth semester kicks in. I will need the stress reduction and my behind certainly does not need to get any wider.
Damn nursing school...

I am looking forward to a relaxing time, with skiing!!! Lots of physical activity and lots of down time.
My gosh, maybe I'll read something other than nursing!!??!

Maybe X-men Isn't Too Far Off?

This is a very interesting blurb of an article published in the National Academy of the Proceedings of Science. Human evolution is happening at a break-neck speed.

Apparently our discovery of agriculture and thus a better diet along with culture and community living has spurned on our evolution. Humans are now living in new environments that require fast adaptation.

So what's a Homo sapien to do?

Evolve...


The question is are we E-volving or De-evolving.....

Quote For the Day

SUCCESS

To laugh often and much
to win the respect of intelligent people
and affection of children; to earn the
appreciation of honest critics and
endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty, to find the best
in others; to leave the world a bit
better, whether by a healthy child
a garden patch or redeemed
social condition; to know even
one life has breathed easier because
you have lived. This is to have
succeeded.


-Ralph Waldo Emerson


I doubt it will ever be stated better.

Consumerism and Christmas

I have found the commercial that embodies why I dislike Christmas and what it has come to represent in our society.
It is the Dodge Caravan commercial of the mom talking about how her son went to the friend's house and saw his friend's new Dodge Caravan. She states her son came home and asks, "Mommy, why doesn't our van have swivel seats?" and, "Mommy why doesn't our van have dual DVD players?"
At the end of the commercial she plaintively tells her son, "...your Daddy and I are going right over to the Dodge dealer to get a new Caravan, Mommy loves you."

Since when do Christmas presents involve new autos because our kids think we should all have new cars? Why do we have to buy a zillion things and spend money we don't have in the belief that if we don't, we won't be thought of well or loved or something bad would happen?

Is it not gift enough that we have health, family and life? I am all for striving for the best, but to keep our kids happy by purchasing things....what's the point? They have too much already.

For many, I think this is what Christmas has boiled down to: Who spends the most. Gifts are fine, but come on.
Case in point, one year my Ex's niece, all of almost three years old, said on Christmas morning, "Do I have to open more presents, I'm tired." I think it was over kill.

I just don't agree with such consumerism as a replacement for presence in a person's life, especially children's lives.

Be there, the presents go away.
Money is not the most important thing.

The Light Grows Brighter...

I have one week, one final left. Then semester three is done! All I have to do is live through the last semester and take the NCLEX-or nursing boards.

I am still not certain about exactly what field of nursing I want to go into. This is the definite "NO" list:

1. Anything OB: Being all up in another woman's WhooHa is just not my ball of wax. Oh, and catching that critter as it slides or is forceped out of Mom, no thank you. I have no problem with blood and guts, but massaging funduses to make them contract and bleed, um, that's a big no too. And I don't want to inspect your episiotomy for a living. Ew factor to the nth degree. So, no OB.
2. Psych: I am too afraid I will see my family there. And those people are crazy.
3. Geriatrics: It is a character flaw, I realize, but I am not cut out for the old person stuff. Or to be groped by the dirty old man when taking his vitals. I like healthy old people because they are a riot, but no sick ones please, I already have one of those.
4. Med-Surg: Boooorrringgggg. Pass meds, chart, no adrenaline. There are great med-surg nurses out there, but I don't think I am one of them.

So, you wonder, what does the possible yes list hold?? This list is in very faint pencil, so don't hold me to it.

1. Big person ICU or trauma. This should be no surprise to those who know me. The down side is I would want the best training and it is found at Parkland.....
2. Research nursing: Just do what I do now only make gobs more $$. Not such a bad deal.
3. Pediatrics: Shocking, huh? I liked my Children's rotation. I don't know if I could do it full time, but it is not on the No list.
4. After I have worked for a while, I will go back to university and teach. I have always loved teaching and I know I will end up there.

This is the list so far. Anyone out there with any ideas, I am all ears. It is a little strange for me personally to not be driven in one specific direction. This is why I am getting my RN; choices. I can do anything I want, this was the whole deal.

Go to the light, go to the light!!!!

Words From a Boomer Nursing Student

My monthly copy of Imprint, our nursing student organization magazine arrived today. There is an article about retiring into nursing. Yes, retiring and then going to nursing school. There is a passage in it that really speaks to me. The author discusses what it is that made her want to go back and basically start again, reinvent herself. This is an excerpt from that article that I thoroughly agree with:

Furthermore, a trait that I share with Dan and Gary is a fear of complacency. To be complacent is to be stagnant. In business, stagnation means a failure to thrive, The same holds true in personal life. I don't wish to ever grow complacent or simply happy with the status quo. To do so will have meant that I have lost my competitive spirit, my desire to excel, and my natural curiosity. I will have lost my sense of adventure, my desire for new opportunities and experiences, my "edge." Should complacency ever occur, I would undoubtedly grow mentally and emotionally old.

Really, isn't this what living, really living life is about?

Engineered food for Cats?

It seems that scientists can't keep from jacking with nature. Why do we want a mouse that isn't afraid of a cat??

It seems genetics is a great deal responsible for our reactions to our environment. Makes sense to me, otherwise species would not have been able to thwart predators' for this long.

Let to natural selection, I doubt this new genetically engineered mouse would survive. Cats are not chanting, "Mice are friends, not food."

Poor mouse!

China Deserves our Attention

It seems China has decided it will not go disrespected or underestimated any longer. A Song class submarine surfaced within firing range of several US battleship practicing in the Pacific.

Whether we like it our not, the world as a whole must accept that China is an up and coming new world power. With 1/3 the world's population and a very well controlled population, recognition of their potential needs to be acknowledged.

Quite the wake up call if you ask me.

I Found My Next Bike!!

We went to the International Motor Cycle Show on Sunday. After sitting on practically everything there, I found it. Then I went and sat on everything again, but still came back to it.

Why am I attracted to some of the most expensive things out there??

My next bike will be a BMW F800ST. With the lower seat option, I am flat footed on both sides of the bike. It weights the same as Moose, but the engine is lower and you sit on the gas tank which lowers its center of gravity.
I loved it.
It is also expensive...dammit!

Of course, I have to have the Electric blue color!!

Only 11 classes left...

I have 11 actual classes left in this semester of school. The light grows brighter at the end of the tunnel. I cannot wait till it is all over. Just think, after this, there is only one more semester left!!
A more pressing question is what field of nursing do I want to go into? I have just about settled on an ICU rotation. Parkland, most likely since their internship is one of the best around and you get rotations in all ICU fields: Neuro, Burn, Emergency, Cardiac and one more that I can't think of right now.
Obviously, no laboring moms, no NICU and no postpartum-yuck! Peds was OK, but I think I would get bored. That leaves trauma and ICU.

I have to start hunting for a job in January. This is why I need to narrow it down fairly soon! Wish me luck.